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Not many people got up in arms about the remake of My Bloody Valentine because the original simply isn't one of those beloved films. The 1981 Canadian movie has a very iconic looking killer - a guy in a gas mask and miner's outfit, wielding a pick-axe - and an iconic kill - a woman stuffed into a dryer - but is otherwise sort of dingy and ugly and not a lot of fun. It also suffers from apparently massive butchering by the MPAA; I've read about up to nine minutes being cut from the film. Even in the era of rampant slasher sequalization, My Bloody Valentine's miner only got one go round.

The 2009 version promises to have a very different fate. Embracing gimmicky 3D effects and heavily splattering gore everywhere, the remake is bloody blast of fun that surprisingly harkens back to a very different era of horror movies. The original slasher films were American-ized, pumped up versions of giallos, Italian murder mysteries that played like Murder She Wrote with a big blood budget. While the modern concept of slasher films is an iconic, known-quantity killer cutting a swath through sexualized teens, early slasher films - like the giallos - often had a mystery component at the center. We'd be left guessing as to who it was that wielded that axe (and some films would give us wildly unsatisfying answers. Friday the 13th doesn't introduce its killer until the third act, which is frustrating). The remake of My Bloody Valentine keeps the original's mystery angle, and I think it's surprisingly effective; while I was never all that worried about who was actually behind the mask, I was engaged enough to enjoy the final reveal. The movie throws in just enough red herrings and misdirections to actually be a little bit of fun.

The plot of the movie is essentially an extrapolation of the original, with some changes and twists thrown in. The action takes place in a small rural town that revolves around the local mine. When Tom, the son of the mine's owner, fucks up his job, five men get trapped in a collapsed tunnel. Three days after the collapse rescuers find four of them dead, with pick-axe wounds to their heads. The survivor, Harry Warden, killed them all so he could conserve air. Warden is found in a coma, from which he awakens on Valentine's Day. He goes on a massive killing spree, first slicing and dicing his way through the hospital (some really excellent corpses here), ripping out the hearts of his victims. Then he heads to the closed down mine shaft where his accident happened, which is now the site of teenage partying. Tom has reluctantly returned to the mine with his girlfriend, and he comes face to face with Harry as he murders all the kids partying. Tom is about to get killed when he's saved by Sherrif Tom Atkins (yay!), who shoots Harry Warden. Warden runs deeper into the mine, which collapses on him. Final death toll: 22.
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